Saying Goodbye to Substack

And why it feels so damn good.

Photo by Junseong Lee on Unsplash

I entered the world of Substack as a writer just four short months ago – full of optimism and promise. I launched as The Wealth Identity Coach – which tied in with my work outside of Substack – working with clients who struggled to reconcile their self-worth with their material worth.

I wanted to open up the conversation around the psychological injuries that can sometimes be associated with a change in wealth circumstances – the rising kind, rather than the falling kind. It’s kind of taboo I guess. But I liked that and I was ready.

I had reams of meaty material that I’d collated over the years – keen to unpick and package in a digestible format for my prospective readers. I was excited to see where the conversation would lead.

I think I wrote some good pieces; but I came unstuck quite quickly. I had too many thoughts and too much research to write with any real ease or fluidity.

I agonised over length, tone, relatability – and grammar (!). There have been too many sleepless nights over grammar.

In short, I became overwhelmed.

I didn’t know how to reconcile the professional parts of my writing with the vulnerability of my personal experiences. I didn’t really know what I felt comfortable with sharing, until I’d hit publish. I no longer felt like a professional in control, but instead became the new girl at school hoping to fit in.

I began to spend a long time thinking about the way my pieces would land, and too much time questioning the way readers engaged with the posts. The joy of simply writing and learning through the process waned quickly. I needed to re-assess what I was doing here in the first place.

Photo by Towfiqu barbhuiya on Unsplash

Outside of Substack, I unexpectedly and organically began working with a broader range of clients than ever before, which made me re-evaluate my entire business model – and what I need to be focusing on.

I subsequently changed my Substack publication name to Life’s Currency, paving the way to write about all the resources we invest in for a more fulfilling life – not just money, but also time, energy, family etc.

But the overwhelm remained.

And this flummoxed me, because as someone in their forties, active in the mental health space in various guises for many years – I would say I’ve gotten to know myself quite well.

I understand what triggers me, which type of environments I can tolerate, and the types of interactions and experiences that fill my cup – and those that drain it.

I know what is likely to make me exhausted, when I need to reign things in, and when I am at my most vulnerable.

By knowing these things about myself, I’ve been able to make considered choices – generally enabling me to live a pretty contented and harmonious life.

But somehow Substack de-railed my safe state of equilibrium. It’s unlike any place I usually find myself in because it’s almost impossible to read the room. Those useful verbal and non-verbal signs and signals that help us navigate relationships just aren’t there. It feels like talking into the wind and hoping our words will land on the right ears to make a difference (which I would hazard a guess is the reason most writers write publicly).

The writer and influential Substacker Poorna Bell touched on this with a Note about ‘liking’ a piece (if you actually liked it) which ended up sparking quite a lively debate. What I garnered from it was that writers are keen on validation via ‘likes’ (understandably because there are few other metrics as to whether your piece is any good), and readers generally don’t wan’t to be told they have to play by any unwritten rules – and they are busy, and they will like something if they damn well want to. Also understandable.

So the outcome for me, is that I’ve listened to my physical and mental responses to writing this newsletter, and come to the conclusion that it doesn’t align with what I want from life. Because when I really want something, I’m all in. I learn everything, and do everything in my power to achieve a good result. And if I aim to do that with Substack, it will dominate most of my waking hours. It will take me away from my real coaching work, away from necessary commercial projects, distracted and away from the needs of my family, and keep me in a low-level state of anxiety for the entire time I remain.

And that is simply not worth it.

In its place, will be a furthering of my professional and personal development in ways that truly make me happy – and most importantly, align with my core values of connection, growth, humour, family, contribution, and integrity.

I may re-join a writing course (for fun), and best of all – I can go back to enjoying Substack as I once did. Using my account to follow the diverse group of brilliant writers who make me think, generously take me along on their personal journeys, give me a laugh, and more often than not, allow me a bit of escapism.

And that is something to look forward to.

Anna x

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Who am I?

I’m Anna, an ICF accredited Personal Development Coach and Certified Money Coach (CMC)® helping clients move through life’s transitions with confidence by making sense of who they are now – and what they want next.

You can find me here – www.annaholbrookcoaching.co.uk